The same advice, from two different eras:
*** w08 4/1 pp. 13-16 Raising Children in a Permissive World ***
Raising Children in a Permissive World
HAVE you ever watched a child begging for a certain toy that the parent does not wish to buy? Or a child who wants to run and play when the parent has said, “Stay put”? You can see that in cases like these, the parent wants to act in the child’s best interests. Nonetheless, all too often the parent gives in. Under a barrage of whining, the parent changes no to yes.
Many parents seem to believe that good parenting means bending to the will of their children in most things. In the United States, for example, a poll was taken of 750 children aged 12 to 17. When asked how they respond when their parents tell them no, nearly 60 percent of the children said that they keep asking. Some 55 percent found that this tactic usually worked. Their parents may feel that such permissiveness shows love, but does it really?
Consider this wise proverb from ancient times: “If one is pampering one’s servant from youth on, in his later life he will even become a thankless one.” (Proverbs 29:21) Granted, a child is not a servant. Would you not agree, though, that the principle applies to child rearing? Pampering children, giving them all they want, may cause them to grow up to be “thankless”—spoiled, willful, unappreciative adults.
In contrast, the Bible advises parents: “Train up a boy according to the way for him.” (Proverbs 22:6) Wise parents follow this direction, setting and enforcing clear, consistent, and reasonable rules. They do not confuse love with permissiveness; nor do they reward children for whining, nagging, or throwing tantrums. Rather, they agree with Jesus’ wise words: “Just let your word Yes mean Yes, your No, No.” (Matthew 5:37) What, though, is involved in training children? Consider a powerful illustration.
“Like Arrows in the Hand”
The Bible illustrates the parent-child relationship in a way that highlights a child’s need for parental guidance. Psalm 127:4, 5 says: “Like arrows in the hand of a mighty man, so are the sons of youth. Happy is the able-bodied man that has filled his quiver with them.” So children are likened to arrows, and the parent is likened to a mighty warrior. Just as an archer knows that his arrows will not hit the target by chance, loving parents realize that child rearing cannot be a haphazard business. They want their children to reach a “target”—a fulfilling life as happy, responsible adults. They want their children to make good choices, to be wise and avoid needless problems, and to achieve worthwhile goals. But wanting such things is not enough.
If an arrow is to reach its target, what is needed? It must be thoroughly prepared, well protected, and powerfully directed toward its target. Likewise, children need to be prepared, protected, and directed if their journey toward adulthood is going to be successful. Let us consider these three aspects of child rearing one at a time.
Thoroughly Preparing the Arrow
The arrows used by archers in Bible times were prepared very carefully. The shaft, perhaps made of a lightweight wood, had to be carved by hand and made as straight as possible. The tip had to be sharp. At the other end of the shaft, feathers were attached to stabilize the arrow in flight, keeping it on course.
Parents want their children to be like those straight arrows—upright, free from deviation. Therefore, if they are wise, they do not turn a blind eye to serious faults but lovingly help their children to work on these and overcome them. There will be plenty of such work to do with any child, for “foolishness is tied up with the heart of a boy.” (Proverbs 22:15) The Bible thus exhorts parents to discipline their children. (Ephesians 6:4) Indeed, discipline plays a vital role in forming and straightening out a child’s mind and character.
No wonder, then, that Proverbs 13:24 says: “The one holding back his rod is hating his son, but the one loving him is he that does look for him with discipline.” In this context, the rod of discipline represents a means of correction, whatever form it may take. By administering loving discipline, a parent seeks to correct faults that if they were to become deeply rooted, would cause the child much misery in adult life. Truly, withholding such discipline amounts to hate; administering it is an act of love.
A loving parent also helps the child to understand the reasons behind the rules. Discipline thus involves not only the giving of commands and the meting out of punishment but, more important, the imparting of understanding. The Bible notes: “An understanding son is observing the law.”—Proverbs 28:7.
The feathers, or fletching, that an archer attaches to his arrows help them to fly straight after they leave his bow. Likewise, Bible teachings from the Originator of the family arrangement can stay with children even after they leave home, benefiting them throughout life. (Ephesians 3:14, 15) How, though, can parents make sure that such teachings are really “attached” to their children?
Notice God’s counsel to Israelite parents in Moses’ time: “These words that I am commanding you today must prove to be on your heart; and you must inculcate them in your son.” (Deuteronomy 6:6, 7) So parents need to do two things. First, they need to learn and apply God’s Word themselves, actually coming to love God’s laws. (Psalm 119:97) Then they are in a position to apply the second part of the scripture—to “inculcate” God’s laws in their children. That means impressing the value of such laws on their children’s hearts through effective teaching and frequent repetition.
Clearly, there is nothing old-fashioned or out-of-date about teaching Bible principles or using loving discipline to correct serious faults. These are vital ways to prepare those precious “arrows” for a straight and steady flight toward adulthood.
Protecting the Arrow
Let us return to the illustration recorded at Psalm 127:4, 5. Recall that the archer “filled his quiver” with his arrows. Once prepared, arrows had to be protected. Thus, the archer carried them in a quiver, where they would not be easily damaged or broken. Interestingly, the Bible speaks prophetically of the Messiah as a polished arrow that his Father “concealed . . . in his own quiver.” (Isaiah 49:2) Jehovah God, the most loving Father imaginable, did indeed protect his beloved Son, Jesus, from all manner of harm until the appointed time came for the Messiah to be put to death as foretold. Even then, God protected his Son from being permanently harmed by death, bringing him safely back to heaven, to live eternally.
Likewise, good parents are concerned about protecting their children from the dangers of this degraded world. It may be that parents prohibit certain activities that would unnecessarily expose their children to dangerous influences. For example, wise parents take this principle seriously: “Bad associations spoil useful habits.” (1 Corinthians 15:33) Protecting children from association with those who do not respect the moral standards of the Bible will likely keep young ones from making a number of costly, even deadly, mistakes.
Children may not always appreciate parental protection. In fact, they may well resent it at times, for protecting your children will often mean telling them no. A respected author of books on child rearing comments: “Though they don’t always show it and probably won’t thank you at that moment, children really do want parents to provide safe, predictable structure in their lives. We can do that by being an authoritative parent who sets limits on behavior.”
Yes, protecting your children from anything that might rob them of their peace, their innocence, or their clean standing before God is an essential way to show that you love them. In time, they will likely come to understand your motives, and they will appreciate your loving protection.
Directing the Arrow
Note that Psalm 127:4, 5 likens the parent to “a mighty man.” Does this mean that only a father can be effective in the parental role? Not at all. In fact, the principle of this illustration applies to both fathers and mothers—and to single parents as well. (Proverbs 1:8) The phrase “mighty man” suggests that a considerable amount of strength was required to shoot an arrow from a bow. In Bible times, bows were sometimes mounted with copper, and a soldier was said to ‘tread the bow,’ perhaps bracing the bow with his foot so that he could string it. (Jeremiah 50:14, 29) Clearly, much energy and effort went into pulling that taut string back in order to shoot those arrows toward their mark!
Similarly, raising children requires considerable effort. They do not simply rear themselves, any more than an arrow launches itself toward its target. Sadly, many parents today seem unwilling to expend the kind of effort that is needed. They take the easy way out. They let television, school, and peers teach their children about right and wrong, about morals, about sex. They let their children have whatever they want. And when saying no seems like too much work, they simply say yes—often excusing their decision by saying that they do not want to hurt their children’s feelings. In reality, it is their permissiveness that will do their children real, lasting harm.
Raising children is hard work. Doing that work wholeheartedly with the guidance of God’s Word is certainly demanding, but the rewards are priceless. Parents magazine noted: “Studies . . . have found that children brought up by loving but authoritative parents—those who are supportive of their children yet maintain firm limits—excel academically, develop better social skills, feel good about themselves, and are happier overall than kids whose parents are either too lenient or excessively harsh.”
There is an even better reward. Earlier we considered the first part of Proverbs 22:6: “Train up a boy according to the way for him.” The verse continues with these heartwarming words: “Even when he grows old he will not turn aside from it.” Does this inspired proverb offer a guarantee of success? Not necessarily. Your child has free will and will grow up to exercise it. But this verse offers parents a loving assurance. What is that?
If you train your children according to the Bible’s counsel, you are creating the most favorable circumstances to bring about a marvelous result—seeing your children grow up to be happy, fulfilled, and responsible adults. (Proverbs 23:24) By all means, then, prepare those precious “arrows,” protect them, and expend yourself in directing them. You will never regret it.
[Picture on page 13]
Do parents show love for their children by giving in to their every demand?
[Picture on page 15]
A loving parent explains the reasons behind family rules
[Picture on page 15]
Good parents protect their children from the dangers of this degraded world
[Picture on page 16]
Raising children is hard work, but the rewards are priceless
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From some 50 years earlier:
*** w54 1/15 pp. 54-62 Disciplining Children for Life ***
Disciplining Children for Life
“The reproofs of discipline are the way of life.”—Prov. 6:23, RS.
JEHOVAH admonishes children: “Keep your father’s commandment, and forsake not your mother’s teaching. Bind them upon your heart always; tie them about your neck. When you walk, they will lead you; when you lie down, they will watch over you; and when you awake, they will talk with you. For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of discipline are the way of life.” (Prov. 6:20-23, RS) Sometimes, though parents give the proper instruction and set the proper example, children refuse to obey. That brings us to discipline, and forces a facing of that hotly controversial question: to spank or not to spank.
2 Many child psychologists put a “hands off” sign on children, as did one who said: “Do you mothers realize that every time you spank your child you show that you are hating your child?” Jehovah says: “He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.” A spanking may be a lifesaver to a child, for Jehovah says: “Do not withhold discipline from a child; if you beat him with a rod, he will not die. If you beat him with the rod you will save his life from Sheol.” Again, “Blows that wound cleanse away evil; strokes make clean the innermost parts.” It is Jehovah who can peer into the innermost parts of men and children, and at one time, typical of our day, he did this and saw: “The inclination of the heart of man is bad from his youth up.” The remedy? “Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline drives it far from him.”—Prov. 13:24; 23:13, 14; 20:30, RS; Gen. 8:21, NW; Prov. 22:15, RS.
3 With some children occasions arise when words fall short, and parents may have to become men and women of action, applying the rod to preserve the child from spoiling. Though it understands your words, it may not pay heed, as Proverbs 29:19 (AT) says: “Not by mere words can a servant be trained; for he understands, but will not pay heed.” Two verses later (Prov. 29:21, AT) it says: “He who pampers his servant from childhood will in the end gain nothing but ingratitude.” That also holds true for children pampered by parents. Children have no respect for the doting or negligent or indulgent parent that withholds correction; with such they only become more demanding and disrespectful. On the other hand, discipline that is wisely, fairly and mercifully administered gains respect, as Paul wrote to the Hebrews: “We used to have fathers who were of our flesh to discipline us and we used to give them respect. . . . True, no discipline seems for the present to be joyous, but grievous; yet afterward to those who have been trained by it it yields peaceable fruit, namely, righteousness.” (Heb. 12:9, 11, NW) Such discipline is to train, not inflict painful punishment.
4 In disciplining remember the proverb: “To act without reflection is not good; and to be over-hasty is to miss the mark.” To strike a blow in sudden anger is evidence of poor motive, namely, the release of the emotional pressure of a steamed-up parent. Such discipline is for selfish relief, not done out of love for the child. In many cases the solution may be found to lie between the two extremes of never spanking and always spanking. But this is not true in all cases. The temperament and disposition of the individual child must be considered. Some are very sensitive, and such drastic measures as spanking may not be necessary. Some may be so callous that such drastic measures may be ineffective. Concerning men these two proverbs are written: “On the lips of a sensible man wisdom is found; but a man without sense needs a rod for his back.” “A rebuke sinks deeper into a man of intelligence than a hundred lashes into a fool.” (Prov. 19:2; 10:13; 17:10, AT) So it is with children. Some are more sensible than others; some are meeker than others. A rebuke may discipline them more than a whipping would others who are more stubborn and in whose childish heart may be bound up a more than usual amount of folly.
5 Parents, if this is the case with your child, be patient. As unflattering, as unpalatable, as unacceptable as it may be to you, the child got it from you. In you it may be subdued, it may never have come to the surface; but it is in you somewhere, because your child did not get it from nowhere. We must face it: adults give their children a bad start. Adam and Eve gave everyone a bad start. Hence the Bible says: “Man that is born of a woman is of few days, and full of trouble. Who can bring a clean thing out of an unclean? not one.” “I was shapen in iniquity; and in sin did my mother conceive me.”—Job 14:1, 4; Ps. 51:5; Rom. 5:12.
USE OF LOVE AND GOOD SENSE IN DISCIPLINING
6 This shows children need guidance; it also shows they will not be perfect. Expect neither too much nor too little. The rules of conduct should be clear to them, and fair and with merciful allowances. Remember their age, for they will act it. Do not expect them to act like little adults. Paul said that when he was a babe he acted like one. (1 Cor. 13:11) After reasonable rules are established and the child knows them, enforce them with promptness and consistency, so the child knows what to expect. But if they are spasmodically enforced according to your whim or mood of the moment, or if punishment for disobedience is long delayed, the child will be emboldened to chance violations to see how far he can go and how much he can get away with, just as adults become bold in evil-doing when retribution seems to lag: “Because sentence against an evil work is not executed speedily, therefore the heart of the sons of men is emboldened in them to do evil.” If discipline is not fair and consistent the very keen sense of justice possessed by children will be offended and resentment arise. So correct in fairness and firmness, tempered by love and mercy. Jehovah remembers our frame is dust; let us remember the child’s also is dust.—Eccl. 8:11, AS, margin; Knox; Ps. 103:13, 14.
7 Some parents are always nagging at their children, harping about things that do not really matter, building up feelings of annoyance and irritation and exasperation in their children, making them rebellious and downhearted, all in violation of the following Bible instructions to parents: “You, fathers, do not be irritating your children, but go on bringing them up in the discipline and authoritative advice of Jehovah.” “You fathers, do not be exasperating your children, so that they do not become downhearted.” (Eph. 6:4; Col. 3:21, NW) If parents follow the discipline and authoritative advice of Jehovah they will not be irritating and exasperating their children and making them downhearted with a lot of nagging over immaterial matters. Do not hedge the child in by numerous, needless prohibitions, but only where it really matters. Restrain when there is real reason, but never just to show authority. When possible let them make their own choices and decisions, commending the wise ones. If they do well on an assigned task or in field service, commend them as an encouragement. Does not the Bible do this, saying, “Well done, good and faithful slave”? (Matt. 25:21, NW) Sometimes control is necessary because of time or place, not because an act is wrong in itself. For example, romping during a meeting hurts the child and others. No wrong in romping, but the timing is bad. There is a time to play, a time to romp, and a time to listen, a time to learn. So watch time and place, for the good of everyone.—Prov. 29:15.
8 So in summing up on the matter of discipline, administer it in love, not in angry shouts or blows. (Prov. 15:1) Punishments may vary according to temperaments of meekness or stubbornness. You may punish by withholding a token of affection, or reward by giving such token. You may banish the unruly child from the company of the obedient, or deny its participation in a family pleasure, or withhold a favorite dessert or pastime, or at times you may have to use the literal rod to preserve the order of the home. To illustrate the need of different methods, consider this actual case. A small boy in Brooklyn had a dental appointment. Before his mother took him there a 4-year-old playmate told him that whenever she went to the dentist she kept her mouth shut. So when his mother took him he refused to open his mouth. Back at home, he got a good spanking. Next dental appointment he again refused to open up. A harder spanking followed, but still his mouth remained shut in the dental chair. But this youngster was a television fan. He was denied all access to the set. About two televisionless days later he announced he was ready to take on the dentist with an open mouth. But regarding the use of the rod, it may be noted that in the face of mounting juvenile delinquency many child psychologists are doing an about-face on spanking, many swinging back to the rod idea. Many have been forced to admit that the lessons learned at mother’s knee do not make as lasting an impression as those learned while stretched across daddy’s.
9 But when the Bible speaks of the rod of correction it does not necessarily mean a literal rod; in the broad sense it means parental authority. Its corrective influence may take a variety of forms. Whatever form it takes, it should always be wielded in love and mercy, never in anger or rigid justice. Never try to mete out the full measure of what the child’s conduct might justly demand. Jeremiah 10:23 has been cited, but now read what it says, along with verse 24 (AS): “O Jehovah, I know that the way of man is not in himself; it is not in man that walketh to direct his steps. O Jehovah, correct me, but in measure; not in thine anger, lest thou bring me to nothing.” So parents, when you correct your children let it be measured out in love and mercy, not in anger or full justice. As Christians you are not under strict justice but divine mercy, and must show mercy to others, especially to your children, whose imperfections and blemishes are traceable in greater or less degree to you and your forebears. And in wielding the rod of parental authority, if you have more than one child avoid showing partiality, else you may make one hated by the other. Joseph’s brothers thought their father partial to Joseph, and as a result hated Joseph. The older son showed resentment when he thought his father was favoring the prodigal son. (Gen. 37:3, 4; Luke 15:25-30) If you hold one child up as an example to another, you may make the exemplary one hated by the other.
10 Parents, it is so necessary to show your children that they are loved and wanted. Recently the New York Times reported that 34 foundlings died for no reason but a lack of mother love. A book on efficiency tells of training in modern psychology now being given schoolteachers, but adds ruefully: “Although it must be admitted that the old-fashioned school marm who simply loved children may have been much more successful in helping her pupils.” Look magazine recently said that all rules and “techniques for handling children mean far less than the general spirit and atmosphere of the home.” The new-world-society atmosphere highlighting love and Jehovah’s spirit is essential in rearing children for life eternal.
11 Parents, this love is not shown by gushing sentimentality or baby talk or indulging every childish whim or acceding to every material want. Love is not pampering. It makes the child feel wanted. Children are spoken of as an inheritance from Jehovah, likened to tender olive plants around the table. They need tender care to grow up and bear fruit. They are the fruit of the mother’s womb. Jehovah’s Word tells us the fruit of our lips should praise him, and the fruit of the womb should do likewise. (Ps. 127:3; 128:3; Heb. 13:15) Do your children praise Jehovah? If you will, they usually will. Help them, show them the way, direct their steps, give good instruction, set right examples, correct when necessary, and guide them to eternal living with the New World society. Be examples they can have pride in claiming and find happiness in following. As Manoah prayed for guidance from Jehovah in rearing Samson, you pray for his guidance in rearing your children.—Prov. 17:6; 20:7, AT; Judg. 13:8.
A WORD TO THE CHILDREN
12 Well now, what are all you children thinking? That here is a big crowd of grownups ganging up on you, thinking up more ways to hem you in and make your life miserable? No, we are not ganging up on you, but ganging up for you, to be strong to protect you, to keep you in our midst, serving God and safe from Satan. All who love Jehovah must gang together to help one another do God’s work. If you children have been the subjects of our discussion, it is because you are the objects of our affection. All right, you say, but if you grownups are so fond of us what is all this talk about discipline, and especially spanking? Well, with you children that does touch a tender spot, does it not? But to help us get to the bottom of the matter let us look at the animals that you children love. Jehovah’s wisdom is reflected in his creations, so to look to animals for instruction is not to lower our thinking to their level, but to lift it to God’s thoughts. We are told to go to the ant to learn industriousness, to consider the locust for an example of unity; so we are on no unscriptural side trip when we look at the training some animals give their young, which springs from God-given instinct.—Rom. 1:20; Prov. 6:6-8; 30:27; Joel 2:7, 8.
13 When animal parents train their young they are aware of the limitations of their young, that at the start the little ones cannot do big things. So they start their young out in what might be called an animal kindergarten, and work up. For example, barn swallows catch insects on the wing. That is too hard for young birds, so the parent birds catch the fast-flying insects, hover near the nest or perch of the young birds, drop the insects, and the youngsters fly out and catch the slow-falling bodies. Soon they can snatch their own food out of thin air. The mother fox, after the young are weaned, brings captured mice and other food into the den. Later she leaves it at the entrance, and as the babies get bigger she leaves it farther and farther away, to teach her young to hunt for their food. Toward the end of this training the parent fox even hides the prey beneath leaves and rubbish, thus forcing the young to use the sense of smell as well as the sense of sight. In these and many other cases, as the young learn more the parents do less. So with you children. You need to be trained by your parents, and as you learn more and gain experience you will be allowed to do more and more. As you increase in ability parental control will decrease.
14 But what about discipline in the woods? Well, we just have to face the fact that these animal mothers are old-fashioned and seem not to have read any modern books on child psychology, because they surely do spank their young. A mother tiger was annoyed when one of her babies kept pawing at her. She tried to ignore these advances, but finally took the youngster’s whole head in her mouth, squeezed and shook it, while the startled baby whimpered. You children probably have never had your mother take your head in her mouth, but you have probably got a shaking when you have annoyed her and not stopped when told to.
15 Did any of you children ever get in trouble for not sitting still, maybe during a meeting? You should go to the fawn, you restless ones, and consider its ways, and be wise. A mother deer will conceal its baby or fawn and instruct it to freeze motionless, and it will remain without moving for hours. Rarely do fawns disobey and move, but if they do they get a spanking from sharp mother hoofs.
16 Did you ever get a spanking for being too venturesome, for doing something in your playing that mother thought might result in your being hurt? If you did, you have company in your plight. A young koala, that is, the little bear that looks just like the toy teddy bear, was in captivity with its mother. There was a tree in the cage, and the baby would go out on small limbs where the mother could not follow. At the first opportunity she nabbed him and spanked him so hard his cries were heard a long way off. After that he stayed off the small branches.
17 Some years ago in Sequoia National Park, in the western United States, garbage was dumped in an opening in the forest and bears would come there in large numbers to eat. Once a mother bear came out of the forest with two cubs, but before she came on down to where the grown bears were eating she sent her babies up a tree. One came down, and the mother rushed over and gave it a good wallop with her paw and sent it rolling. It scurried up the tree in a hurry, and both of them stayed there till she had finished her meal and returned to the foot of the tree and signaled them down. Remember the scripture that appeared earlier in this study, where it told the parent to spank the child, that spanking would not kill it but would deliver it from the grave? Well, that is just what this mother bear was doing. She spanked the cub; that did not kill it, but it saved it from death. Had it gone down where the big bears were eating a large vicious male might have killed it.
18 There is no juvenile delinquency in the animal realm, because there are no delinquent animal mothers. They do not spare the paw and spoil the young, but spank to preserve the young. They would die fighting for their young, just as your parents would die for you; yet they spank their young, just as your parents may spank you. In the woods the first mistake is often the last, and if the young animals disobeyed their mothers they would become the main course on a woodland menu and end up in another animal’s stomach. So, while it may not be pleasant for them to be spanked, it is better to be beaten than to be eaten.
19 Now you children may not think so, but there is a wild, beastly creature that would like to eat you. Peter warned all of us about him, saying: “Your adversary, the Devil, walks about like a roaring lion, seeking to devour someone.” (1 Pet. 5:8, NW) That someone is you, because you love Jehovah. The Devil hates Jehovah, and would like to swallow up in the evil surroundings of his old world everyone that loves Jehovah. So just as the wild animal mothers discipline their young to keep them from being eaten, your parents discipline you to keep you from being devoured by the Devil’s world. The animal mothers train and discipline their young in accord with the instinct God gives them; your parents train and discipline you in accord with the Bible instruction God gives them.
20 If your parents love you theocratically they will guide you in the way taken by young Samuel, Jeremiah, Timothy and Jesus. They will steer you away from bad examples, such as the wicked boys that came with the mob at Sodom to attack God’s angels and commit immoral acts. (Gen. 19:4, 5) Your parents will guide you away from false worship, so you will not be like the children of Israel that provoked Jehovah to anger, as he said: “The children gather wood, and the fathers kindle the fire, and the women knead their dough, to make cakes to the queen of heaven, and to pour out drink offerings unto other gods, that they may provoke me to anger.” (Jer. 7:18) You do not want to jeer at Jehovah’s servants, as youngsters did at Job. He said: “Yea, young children despised me; I arose, and they spake against me.” (Job 19:18) In mocking God’s servants you blaspheme him, as did the mob of children that taunted Elisha by saying, “Go up, thou bald head.” Jehovah caused bears to claw forty-two of those juvenile delinquents.—2 Ki. 2:23, 24.
21 That may seem severe treatment for calling someone a baldhead, but more than disrespect was involved. It was the taunt “Go up” that called for divine vengeance. It was telling Elisha to go up as he reported Elijah did. (2 Ki. 2:11) It showed disbelief in Jehovah’s miracle in Elijah’s case, and was a taunt for Elisha to prove it by duplicating it. It could also indicate that Elisha should go up as did Elijah and in that way the community would be rid of him. It suggested that his presence was unwanted and for him to clear out of the territory. It is likely that adults were responsible for this delinquency, the childish taunting being a reflection of the adult attitude if it was not directly instigated by religiously opposed adults. At any rate, the children were punished for their blasphemy. As Proverbs 20:11 states: “Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.” Youthfulness alone does not save delinquents who blaspheme, as shown by the command given Jehovah’s executional forces at Armageddon: “Go ye after him through the city, and smite: let not your eye spare, neither have ye pity: slay utterly old and young, both maids, and little children, and women.”—Ezek. 9:5, 6.
22 You may obey your parents because they want you to. That is a good reason, but here is a better one—obey because Jehovah wants you to. He says directly to you: “Children, be obedient to your parents in union with the Lord, for this is righteous: ‘Honor your father and mother’; which is the first command with a promise: ‘That it may go well with you and you may endure a long time on the earth.’” (Eph. 6:1-3, NW) Young animals must obey to live long; here Jehovah tells you to obey if you want to endure on earth. Do you love Jehovah? Then obey him. (1 John 5:3) He says, Obey “parents in union with the Lord”; so obey yours who are Jehovah’s witnesses. If it is sometimes hard to do, do it anyway, but look at it as obedience to Jehovah. God tells the wife to be obedient to her husband and the slave to be obedient to his master. How should the wife and the slave view this obedience to the husband and the master? The wife is told to do it “as to the Lord.” The slave is told to do it “as to the Christ.” You children, obey your parents “as to Jehovah,” working at it whole-souled for his sake. (Eph. 5:22; 6:5-8; Col. 3:23, 24, NW) So in this also you are serving Jehovah, just as when you go out in the witness work. Heeding reproof and discipline means life, whereas those “disobedient to parents” are “worthy of death.”—Prov. 15:10; 29:1, AT; Rom. 1:30, 32.
CHOOSING JEHOVAH’S WAY
23 Jehovah’s way is for parents to be guided by his Word, and children to be trained by such parents. Do not the following texts clinch that truth? “We will not conceal it from their children, telling to the coming generation the praises of the Lord, and his might and his wonders which he wrought, when he established a decree in Jacob, and gave Israel a law, which he commanded our fathers to teach unto their children, that the coming generation should know, that children yet unborn should arise, and tell to their children, that they should set their trust in God, and not forget the works of God; but keep his commands.” “The father to the children shall make known thy truth.” “Tell ye your children of it, and let your children tell their children, and their children another generation.” “Apply your hearts to all the words that I am speaking in warning to you today, that you may command your sons to take care to do all the words of this law. For it is no valueless word for you, but it means your life.”—Ps. 78:4-7, AT; Isa. 38:19; Joel 1:3; Deut. 32:46, 47, NW.
24 We must let Jehovah direct our steps and choose our ways. The New World society must never be swayed by old-world methods that have filled the world with rotten fruits of delinquency and crime and death. Let them babble about not inhibiting or frustrating or stunting personalities; they are utterly blinded by the silly wisdom of the dying old world if they cannot see that the sexually immoral, the thieves and murderers, the liars and blasphemers and idolaters should be frustrated. If men do not stunt and strip off the old personality of fallen flesh and don the new personality of godliness, they and their personalities will be annihilated at Armageddon. (Eph. 4:22-24; Col. 3:5-10, NW) It is better to be frustrated and alive than uninhibited and dead. Those of the New World society must now be frustrating and inhibiting and outgrowing the inborn evil within them. It would be suicidal for us to be drawn into the paths of the old world, its ways, its steps. As soon as they come staggering out of one mess they go reeling into another. At Armageddon they will walk into a mess they will never walk out of. Then the wayward ways chosen by men all come to a dead end.
25 And as far as rearing its children is concerned, this old world has made a miserable failure. It reaps the rotten harvest of delinquency sown by its modern methods contrary to God. Yet let the old world have its way with its children, but let it keep its hands off the children of the New World society! Let worldlings choose their own way and direct their own steps. Their way ends in death, their self-directed steps lead to the yawning grave; and en route to death and the grave their way is littered with unspeakably shocking degradation and delinquency. We want none of their ways, none of their steps, none of their degradations, none of their delinquencies, and none of their share of death and none of their space in the grave! No, none of this for our new-world-society children!
26 For our children we want right ways, which means Jehovah’s ways; right steps, which means Jehovah’s steps; and en route to the new world we want their way marked by moral uprightness instead of degraded misconduct, and by works of praise instead of misdeeds of delinquency. And in the midst of mounting godlessness we do not just helplessly sit by and wring our hands and chew our nails and worry and wishfully hope our children do not get sunk in the sordid seas of the old world. We keep them sailing along with the New World society by giving good instruction, by setting right examples, by administering necessary discipline. Let the worldly wiseacres say that if we discipline our children we hate them. Their undisciplined children will die with them at Armageddon, but our disciplined ones will live with us forever in Jehovah’s New World society. So who are the real haters of their children, and who are the real lovers of children? Who guide theirs to death, and who lead theirs to life? Why train our children in the ways of the old world just so they can die with it? We will train them in the ways of the New World society so they can survive with it forever. Forget the way that seems right to men; learn the way that is right to God. What do we care if the way that is right to God seems wrong to men? Whom are we trying to please, God or men? Jehovah God, first, last and always!
27 You parents know what you must do. You children know what you must do. Jehovah knows what he will do. If we obey him, he will do things for us. If we disobey him, he will do things to us. Remember, the meek will inherit the earth; the rebellious will return to the earth. Let us try to inhabit it, not return to it. This is the day of decision. We must make our decision, the old world must make its, and eternal destiny hangs in the balance. So in conclusion we say: If it seems bad in their eyes to choose Jehovah’s way, let them choose in this day of Jehovah whose direction they will take and whose way they will choose; but as for us and all the new-world-society household, we will make Jehovah our God the director of our steps and the chooser of our ways, all to the eternal good of the thousands of children in our midst, and the thousands more who will yet be among us before Armageddon strikes, and the multitudes that will yet be born to the other sheep in the endless new world now at hand! May Jehovah help all parents rear their children for the New World.
